(Publicly accessible book repositories)
Have you ever wanted to be an astronaut? How about a cowboy? Or a lonely disaffected youth unable to operate in the grown-up world of ‘phonies’? Well, you could be all of these things by visiting one special place. No, it’s not Mr. Ben’s magic costume shop! It’s your local library. Your library ticket is a ticket to a hundred lands of wonder, where the only limits are those of your own imagination! So, if you’ve got no imagination, you’re probably best off watching TV or playing computer games. But, they do videos as well as books. And best of all, it’s all completely free! Apart from the videos. And it’s 15p a day if you don’t bring the books back in time. And, don’t use the computers for more than 20 minutes. And could you be a bit quieter please.
Ah, libraries... the fun of libraries derives from their being an amplified microcosm of society, in that everyone really wants to fuck and shout and break stuff, but there are rules, so they can't. The atmosphere enforced quietness and restraint simply magnifies these repressed animalistic urges to the point where they threaten to spill out into an explosive orgy of violent sexual depravity. Which is what library toilets are for. The graffiti in the gents at Glasgow University library was always a favourite for sheer psychotic fervour - a rich blend of sectarian and racial hatred, sexual desperation and psudo-intellectual posturing; appallingly smug Wittgenstein 'jokes' sharing cubicle space with endless catholic-protestant / white-asian feuding and passionate pleas for COCK.
Those wacky students.